Comparison kills connection and clobbers our uniqueness. Let’s explore 4 powerful ways to keep “comparitis” away…
I always used to feel a real kick to the stomach when I compared myself to others.
And THEN when social media was added to the equation? It was like a constant stomach throttling…
They’re so super-productive…I feel like such a slug in comparison. WOMP!
They’re have so many more “followers” than me. POW!
They’re much more [insert quality: knowledgeable, thin, funny, generous, smooth] OOF!
At some point, though, I realized how much comparing myself to others was depleting me.
When I deemed myself to be the “loser” in the comparison game, well… that sucked. And even when I judged myself the “winner”, it left me feeling uncharitable and separate.
Totally not the vibes I was trying to build in myself or the world.
That’s what comparison does… It kills connection and momentum. It also clobbers our creativity, our risk-taking, and our uniqueness… all elements that are so important to those trying to blaze a trail of change.
So, how do you heal from this “comparitis”?
- You focus on shaping your own distinctive path and minimize watching what others are doing.
- You train yourself in honouring the different attributes of others and yourself as opposed to making others a threat. After all, the more awesomeness we have in the world, the better place it will be for all of us.
- You only look at what others are doing only very deliberately and consciously and in the spirit of learning, inspiration, and objectively identifying where you want to up your game.
- You keep reconnecting to your big WHY and the love behind that why. That means coming back to your heart and why you’re choosing to be who you are and do what you do.
For me, following this prescription always moves me from knee-jerk competitiveness into the deeper, richer waters of connection and compassion.
In that place, I’m able to celebrate people’s competence, beauty, or success, as opposed to making those qualities a comment on my own lack. A common refrain in my head is: Look at them go!
I also let the subjects of comparison be an inspiration in cultivating certain qualities & skills I admire, while also acknowledging the precious combination of qualities held in me.
And just a reminder that it takes all kinds, and the world desperately needs YOU bringing your unique combination of experiences, attributes, knowledge, and character to the work of making things better.
So, kick that comparitis to the curb, we’ve got important work to do! 💗
Hugs, Kimberly
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